Memories To rekindle

It was hard for me to plunged into the realm of sadness and face the reality of losing the One i loved so much! Losing someone hurts, and not seeing him no more is so painful.

There were many relatives gathering around in circles after the funeral mass ended. They started to rekindle and sweeping up all the memories up. each and everyone of them wanted to share the moments of their stories..... Some sad, and some happy...It was the moment where everyone get to know each other. Pouring their old stories about ma Grandpa....How nice he was, how strong he was in dealing with the British people long ago, how resposible he was with his family. It was fun to listen but also sad to remember.

No more hugs, no more kisses, no more...But he will always be in my heart forever and ever:)

I wish i could move as soon as possible back to my hometown. It's really hard for me to get back home on time if there are emergency cases like this. Huh!~sigh~

Everyone in the family are trying hard to be strong, and we are still trying....I had lost my dearest cousin and NOW God has taken another one.....But, i'll always give thanks to HIM as he had given enough time to be with these TWO people i really LOVED!

The endurance of this chapter is hard to be described! However, this episode helps me to be more patient in every angles of my life:) Thanks to You God!

We'll Now have a very gloomy X'mas without the TWo of them.....But we'll try to keep the atmosphere Merry enough!

Thanks to my honey who has been so supportive! Thanks Hon! You had been my bestfriend all along...Wish you were here:)

Every memories seems dreary but these are the things that we must look into our lives ...to make us more stronger!

Mj's Gone!Is my beloved ONE going away too? PLease....~Heartache~

LOve You 'Aki (Grandpa)......'

Today's just frantically a very miserable day which had caused me being in the heart attack state.

Recieved a call- My Granpa's holding his life with the oxygen tube. Being in pain, suffering days and nights was an uncountable poignant, dreary days for him. And we are just waiting for the time ticking by....

Heartbreak dazzled through my veins, running and dancing in a swirling patterns, not knowing where it should go. Having said that I am so sad at this juncture.......i couldn't hide the weakness in me trying to BE A STRONG person....

Deep in my heart, i prayed i still have the chance to hug and kiss him......

Thanks To Mimi...i'm shouting this out loud for being with me in times i need a person to cry on!

LOve you MI! You'll be my bestfriend forever and eternity.....

Tuesday Was Disaster!

‘Monday Blues’ are 2 words that are frequently uttered by many of us when we feel- not being in the mood of studying or working after the weekends.

Well, that's what adaptation functions as...... to adapt the Monday atmosphere. And my MONDAY was not mundane nor jaded.It was perfect!

However TUESDAY- was a Disaster! My 5D students have problems to respect their teachers (that includes me) their Form teacher. They tend to talk back whenever the teachers come in the class. I got many complaints about my class. DArn! Well, for me, i'm used to the students giving me stupid feedbacks and giving the no no answers to the questions shooted at them. It is somtimes FUN, but when they over-do it, i get annoyed and irritated. That's where i'll shout at them, and other option is i'll just put myself in a silent mode for a few minutes.

In conclusion, 5D just can't stop talking.....

But, we as human beings are not solely that perfect and we sometimes do not like to be treated like rubbish! There's this One kid who never gave me the respect of being a teacher. It's not that i really want them to respect me but, they need to understand the gap between teacher-students. It's not that i'm not so closed to them, i was being their friends and now they think they can over-what me, i can't find a suitable word to describe that.

This particular students:

i/. has the guts to go through my black pencil bag and take my handphone during class.

ii/. dares to poke me at my waist.

iii/. dares to give a simple touch of finger on my nose.

(even my honey wouldn't do that)

iv/. talks back abruptly and in a rude manner

-Mana ada teacher!

-na kan, na kan, Teacher jugak yang salah!

-Eee, teacher ni kan..tidak boleh kh?!

And now this has to STOP!

I went in class and i asked them to open their workbook! I gave them instructions in english. and everytime i do, i have to translate it in BM. And the thing with ma BM, is that i sometimes get stuck in between my lines because i couldn't figure out the sentence or words that i need. So, i went like urm...urm....urm....

Students said: Lambat jugak teacher cakap nie!

Man! was i damn so HOT and in ANGER!

I had hold on to my patient since the past 5 months ago! And Now i could not bare it no more! I felt like slapping her face! But, i gave a snap of thoughts-I'm a teacher! I can't humiliate infront of all the students.This will just bring down my reputation as a teacher!

What i did was....I took my books and things and directly went out of the class! It was wrong to just let the class alone! But, it's better than NOTHING, right?!

I sat at the staffroom, calming myself. My heart beat pounded fast!Gosh! Good thing a few colleagues of mine spent their time listening to my dilemma.

jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj

After school ends, the whole class came to me crying asking for apology! I think i did the right thing! and this time-they knew and understand that they had gone beyond the limits. I ignored them and left them crying in a group. Was too mad to entertained thier sobbings.

Night: Was texted a few messages of apologies! Gee! I 'm really tired of taking care of them.

kI got this from my class, Today!k

I Love Friday- JuLy,3rd,2009!

d Happy Birthday To Youd

It was Friday! And also my birthday! However, i didn't get to celebrate my birthday and throw a birthday Party Bash!!

Entering 3B is not a burden for me, but what makes me sometimes going into the zone of anger is when they seem not to care to pass up their homeworks. It’s not that they were too slow that I need to get down on my knees and crawl myself through the piles of theories and strategies of teaching to find techniques -to manage these bunch of kids; I don’t even have to really stress up translating in my lessons, but having these pain in the ass students just upset me at how they’re not entering their works on my table. I need to know how much they had developed! Gosh! I DO care and I really Damn Care when it comes to English.

No matter how I punished them, they’ll just passed through, like nothing ever happened! Pinching their nose, (makes them giggle), pinching their side tummies (tickles them more), letting them stand for 30 minutes while participating lesson (makes them want more)…Gees! These students are giving me a heart-attack! This is one of the most listed punishment I have in my long list scroll! Hahahahah..

kThey had only finished up 20 pump ups....They tried bargaining me..But Failed! 30 more to go! k

Told these two lil lovely rascy of mine to write 50 same introductions since Monday and yet they still have not yet turned in their work! Monday was writing time and I told them the techniques of writing a good introduction. However, as I was explaining, they were not paying attention. So, they deserved pumping up and down 50 times. Good exercise for Friday!
The bell rung, showing it was already Recess. I gave the students permit to go out and Eat! The staffroom will now be then crowded with students....I really don't like the chaotic scene. So, I stayed in their class to continue my work.

U can see the files on the table.

Then suddenly, ‘poof’ this homemade cake was in front of me. Mayliana ma dearest student had baked me a birthday cake and it was delicious.

These are a few snaps taken with ma old Nokia 5610-d:-
kHomemade cake....Not the cake you would imagined to have on your birthday, but this one is nice and mouthwatering! k

kA surprised birthday gatheringk



KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

kThese are a few presents i had recieved during that dayk


I wanna say thanks to Erna and Hazelline for such cute presents....

Hazzeline: Thanks fur the big burger coin sucker:) U're really encouraging me to save up...

Erna: Thanks fur the minnie glass, it adds up my glass collection in the kitchen:)

Kak Sugi: Thanks very much! You really know that i like varities of smells.TQ!

Kak Hanita: A very warm thanks to you for this beautiful trio brooches. You're really encouraging me to do a 'Baju Kebaya.. WHich I will get one soon!

Kak Idah: Thank you for this ONE! I really need this for carrying ma stuffs to school! Gosh! You helped me to lessen my burdens. Goodbye Mr. Burden and Welcome MS. Convinient!

What i Really want for my birthday?

The answer is:

Anyone to volunteer making my day? hehhhehe...

Wednesday, Reckless-day!

~LAte entry~My alarm rung at 4:30am yesterday...i meant on Wednesday(early? Yeah! I’m used to it after teaching for a few months) and I was totally having a very good slumber sleep which made me ‘tone deaf’.My recklessness me woke up at 5:15..... this is due to the fact that I didn’t even hear the alarm ringing. I’m not an ‘early riser’ type of person actually. But somehow I found that -I actually am! Well, NOW I am….I could wake up early in the mo and come to school just in time. Of course I could come to school in time- For Christ sake! The school is near the teachers’ quarters. Just 3 minutes by foot that includes the racing down of the stairs. Question:Why just in time when I can be so Early?
Well, the showering part is easy,… however, the make-up part needs to be attended carefully. I wouldn’t want to have the idea of going to school with a reddish plump cheek and a very outlined eye liner, wouldn’t I? No- way Hoozay, I won’t! Hell no to that! ~giggling~ (imagining how’d I look like to be having 70% clowny red blusher on my cheek, 40% model like presenting a peacock eyed outline eye liner stretching at 2mm away from the edge of the eyes, (well, that one is a bit okay! But how about stretching the lines with uneven wavy lines directing upwards (LOL!),and a red glossy Marilyn Monroe lips, …..Uh-uh!Colleagues will be looking at me in astonishment at how much I have gain knowledge to be one of the cuckoo people. It’s very hard to be like them, you need talent to BE one! LoL!
It was already 6:05am…I managed to wrap the belated birthday presents for Kak Leha, Kak Sugi, Kak Sadariah and Kak Hanita. I gave them the prezzies early in the mo.

Hahahah…Tyme2 breakfast lagi tu! Betul2 tida bersopan-santut memberi hadiah! Iskiskisk…… The time was already 6:15am…. Man!

Finished sweeping off my face with the in2it compact powder, even stretches of liquid bodyshop eyeliner(upper eyelid), Fine black line of Avon pencil eyeliner(lower eyes), a shiny pale brown and dark brown of eyeshadows of colourstudio by elianto, a line of baby-cleaner bottle brush of Lancome glossy gloss’ and a few sprays of mixed Miracle Lancome(Le’Reeve) + Anna Sui.

Now that, I’ve finished THAT part, I quickly ordered my hands to get things arranged and trashed them into my one and only beloved green bag( Mimi gave me this one on my engagement day!) Surely almost everything fits in. No matter how heavy the weight is, the sling never gave an impression of going off hook. The price tells it all.

I went down through the steepy stairs via my 2” high heels, I managed to get myself at the garage. I rushed towards my car and I felt something was different with the atmosphere. I didn’t bother much! Well, it was chilly… and it is a usual thing in the morning- - -Ya know, to be ‘Chilly’. I unlocked my car to get a few stuffs and when I got it, I head to the coarse road.

As I shifted where I was standing, I saw the ground wet and the bonnet of my car was also wet. There were poodles of water like white shapy pimples on it. Gees! Did it rain last night? I didn’t realized it did rain. But, if it did not, for sure the ground will not be as wet as it is. Huh! So much for the good sleep I had last night. I didn’t even heard the rain showering down on earth. No wonder it was damn too chilly! I was even shivering when I was showering!~ grin~

kIsn't the scenery beautiful in the mok

kThe ground was very wet. That's the will be 'Computer LAb'

I dunt know when this building be fully used~Fingers cross~k

At school:
On Wednesday, was a relaxing time for me. (I only got 3 periods) Kewl huh!...I took most of the time to get my unfinished core business done. Which were:

i/. Getting the ULBS marks ready( I thought I’ve got that done.Darn!)
ii/. Getting my colleague’s work half done. ( I helped him sincerely, voluntarily)
iii/. Lesson Plan written til Monday next week
iv/ Doing PP for my lessons in class…..Did backups activities if just the electricity goes off)*-*-* ( Our school is likely to be having the hobby of black out for not only a few minutes but it also can drag on till hours) Just imagine teaching in a closed room. U need air, man! Gosh!
v/.Canteen and Filling up ma tank! Human Tank!

AfterNoon:
I stayed up at school until 3pm and got ma ass home and showered myself! It was really refreshing. I got into my tracks, a short sleeve shirt + black inner long handed shirt, and of course my shoes. I left out from home around 4:55pm. Drove myself to the complex and played netball. It was fun getting out and letting all the sweats conquer…

k How far am i a good driver on road? Look At the meters? People kept honking me from behind~Wink~k

kI still got the time to take a shot of myself in the car...Erm, actually I ran thru the red light when i took this pict! Sorry...tida nampak! hehehehek

So much of the recklessness behavior

In conclusion, I’m having so much fun in Tawau, despite of the negative magnet atmosphere of certain people here….No fear! There’s always the Ying and Yang… Wouldn’t want to blog out about someone bad here. Just not healthy! Amen!

FYI, I've got 2 tickets already by NOW, being summoned for illegally breaking the rules on road hehhehehe........